GRAHAM PARKER

Graham Parker is a British singer-songwriter, who is best known as the leader of Graham Parker & The Rumour.

My daughter Natalie was about 11 when the Spice Girls hit with "Wannabe," and naturally, with other kids her age falling prey to their dulcet tones - or perhaps more importantly - their awesome stage names, she was not immune to the charms of this fluffy piece of pop

Then she heard the Beatles. Or rather, saw them on TV. The combination of old Beatles footage and those timeless songs had her in thrall, and even when she found out that one member was dead and the rest were older than her parents and that they had not even been the Beatles since 1970, it didn't dent her enjoyment one bit.

I tried but failed to turn her on to the Stones, though. She found Jagger absurd and just laughed at the very idea. How about some Beefheart? I thought. Well, as any young man in 1971 found out to his chagrin, if you asked a girl "So...do you wanna come back to my place and listen to some Beefheart?" you would find yourself going home alone that night. The Captain didn't impress any better in the 90's either, and my daughter - after suffering half a side of "Safe As Milk" - cracked up laughing and told me that in her mind she pictured Beefheart and his musicians as a bunch of really old men, dressed in overalls and straw hats, and performing on a porch like something out of a black and white western.

Amazingly, by the time she was 17 she was at a Stones concert with her mom digging every song and buying a T-shirt. Like everyone with any sense, she grew to realize that pretty much any act from the 60's and 70's were infinitely better than anything you'd hear from about 1980 onwards. But of course, she never "got" Captain Beefheart. That sound, unfortunately, remains a mystery to every female on the planet earth.